WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Pulitzer Prize committee today announced an unprecedented election coverage award for The Sardine Report, citing the blog’s “remarkable and uncharacteristic dedication to not misinforming the public.”
The Sardine Report has not posted any updates or information about the November 2012 election since the third week of October.
“Their deliberate boycott of the election sets a ridiculously high standard of responsibility that other news outlets can only dream of achieving,” said George T. Flauschter, chair of the Pulitzer Prize Committee. “We can only hope that the rest of the media take notice and avoid polluting the public consciousness with political drivel next time around.”
Sardine Report Grand Exalted Executive Editor Juan Carlos Montel Noriega denied rumors that he spent the better part of the last three weeks high on pain-killers, whimpering softly in the dark and unable to formulate a complete sentence.
“Political news coverage is so bad right now, we knew it would not be hard to outdo the competition,” explained Noriega, who also goes by the title of Supreme Publishing Guru and Master of Amusement. “Then we realized we could just take a few weeks off and not write a thing, and still serve the public better than everyone else.”
He said The Sardine Report would resume normal operations “just as soon as I feel like it.”