Your Certified Accupants® Forecast

By Sardine Report meteorologist Trevor Noyes  

Tonight:  I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can’t deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get scattered thunderstorms with 85% humidity.  Lows in the 50’s.

Tomorrow:  I recommend applying chap stick liberally to your entire body when you get up tomorrow morning. DON’T ASK QUESTIONS, JUST DO IT!!!  Highs in the 140’s.

Rest of the Week:  I’ll admit, I’m a little fuzzy on the outlook for the rest of the week.  I’m just not able to get a clear picture on what to expect.  I guess if I thought either of us were going to be sober at any point in the next five days, I might put a little more effort into it.  Highs in the 70’s.


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Nutrition Information

The Sardine Report is 98% fact free, with no trans facts and no cholesterol. We got lots of mercury, though. Hope you like it.
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